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The holidays are here and the perennial question of the “perfect” gift has raised its ugly head. It seems like you just faced this dilemma a short while ago, but it has been almost a year.  Haven’t you figured it out?  The Smith and the Joneses have figured it out, why haven’t you?  What is wrong with you?

If you felt yourself becoming defensive as you read those words…that was exactly my intention.  Before you burn this email in an impulsive act of defiance, please take a deep breath and relax.  As you exhale, release the anger, guilt or whatever negative emotion was just triggered.  Inhale peace and calm and feel your body relax.

Now, isn’t that better?

You just experienced two opposite states of Being in the span of about 15 seconds.  Did you observe how quickly you moved into the anger and how your body reacted?  Your body’s defensive mechanism kicked in and you became agitated and tense. You either wanted to fight or flee (or burn the words that triggered such a reaction).  No matter the degree, your reaction to the judgmental words triggered a physical response that could have propelled you to take action that you later regretted.

Now that you are calm and coherent again, please read the first paragraph again. Ignore the defensive reaction and keep reading.  When you reach the last question, what is your reaction?  Did you believe the words this time, or did you remain detached?  How did your body feel – was it calm and relaxed?

For the sake of this discussion, let’s assume that you did not dive into the anger again but stayed calm.  Why did you have a different reaction?  The words remained the exact same. The meaning conveyed by them was identical.  The only difference was you – the person reading them.  You made a decision to remain detached and observe the words, instead of reacting to them.

And that my friends, is the best gift you can give yourself and others. To learn how to stay calm and peaceful, no matter the circumstances. To know that you are worthy of love and there is no need to act as if you are not worthy. To set aside the childish impulse of reacting first and regretting it later. You have the power to stop over-reacting any moment you choose.  You have the capability to respond differently, peacefully and sincerely. All you have to do is learn how.

Which is exactly the subject of an entire book called Dance with the Divine, A GuiDance Story.”  It is available at in either the Kindle format (which can be read from any computer, tablet or smart phone) or in paperback form.

Give the gift that keeps on giving all year – the perfect gift for yourself and your loved ones. The gift of you, unadulterated and pure, calm and peaceful in every moment.


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Kathryn Eriksen is the perfect example of a person who has “awakened” to her own spiritual nature.  Raised in a traditional home, she chose the traditional path of college and a legal career.  After 23 years of practicing law, it slowly dawned on her that life did not have to be filled with competition, adversity and limitations.  A zealous advocate for her clients, Kathryn now uses those same highly developed communication skills, laser beam focus and high octane energy to be an advocate for a much higher client – God!

A published author, Kathryn is the author of Dance with the Divine, A GuiDance Story , available at   An inspirational novel, DWTD tells the story of Haven Hartt, a troubled teenager who must decide if she will chose fear or love when faced with a family crisis.  As you observe Haven’s choices, you will find yourself applying the lessons to your own life.  No matter what your age, “Dance with the Divine” is an uplifting step-by-step guide to forgiving the past and stepping forward into your heritage as a child of God. You will be transformed by the powerful lessons shared of living life as if it were a dance and the Divine was your dance partner.

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